Have you ever seen Jim Carrey’s movie Liar Liar? If you haven’t seen it, I’d highly recommend watching it someday when you’re in the mood for a mindless, hysterically funny movie. In the movie, Jim Carrey plays the part of a lawyer named Fletcher who made a promise to his young son that he was going to tell the truth – at all times! For the entire movie, he answers every question and responds to every situation with the truth.
Could you imagine saying what you’re really thinking and feeling at all times?
“The dinner was exceptionally bland.”
“No, we’re not busy this weekend. We just don’t want to come to your party.”
“That was an exceedingly boring presentation. Not only was it boring but, you looked very nervous.”
“No, I don’t have to get off the phone right now but, I’d like to because I’m tired of listening to you.”
“How much weight have you gained?”
“Did you misplace your iron?”
“You’re how old? I thought that you were a lot older than that!”
What would your life be like if you always spoke the truth – to everyone- in every situation?
Here are three of my favorite examples of Jim Carrey’s inability to lie in Liar Liar:
Liar Liar Unable to Tell a Lie example 1:
Cop: You know why I pulled you over?
Fletcher: Depends on how long you were following me!
Cop: Why don’t we just take it from the top?
Fletcher: Here goes: I sped. I followed too closely. I ran a stop sign. I almost hit a Chevy. I sped some more. I failed to yield at a crosswalk. I changed lanes at the intersection. I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light and *speeding*!
Cop: Is that all?
Fletcher: No… I have unpaid parking tickets.
[groans]
Fletcher: … be gentle.
Liar Liar Unable to Tell a Lie example 2:
Fletcher: Your honor, would the court be willing to grant me a short bathroom break?
Judge: Can’t it wait?
Fletcher: Yes it can. But I’ve heard that if you hold it you could damage the prostate gland, making it very difficult to get an erection, or even become aroused!
Judge: Is that true?
Fletcher: It has to be!
Judge: In that case I’d better take a quick break myself.
Liar Liar Unable to Tell a Lie example 3:
Secretary: Do you like my new dress?
Fletcher: What ever takes the focus off your head!
In Kathy Kiely’s column on usatoday.com – “Obama accepts Wilson’s outburst apology” – she talks about Rep. Joe Wilson’s outburst last night during President Obama’s prime time address on health care.
Rep. Joe Wilson Unable to Tell a Lie example 1:
President Obama: There are also those who claim that our reform efforts would insure illegal immigrants. This, too, is false. The reforms — the reforms I’m proposing would not apply to those who are here illegally.
Rep. Joe Wilson: You Lie!
Have you ever done what Joe Wilson did? Has the emotion that’s been building up inside of you ever been so strong that you were unable to control your vocal chords and tongue? It’s happened to most of us. For you and I, it most likely didn’t occur in response to the President of the United Stated in front of Congress on live television!
One of the companies that I’ve worked very closely with over the years has a list of core values that employees are supposed to embody. One of the ones that gets spoken about most frequently is candor.
I think that it gets spoken about frequently at this particular company (and within most organizations that I work with) because it’s rarely utilized.
Candor has one of the shortest definitions within Webster’s dictionary: Frankness of expression: sincerity (honesty).
Why are we so reluctant to be candid with each other? I know from personal experience that when I’m candid with a prospect, customer, my wife or one of my children, the outcome is always favorable. I don’t mean that it was easy. I don’t mean that every one was smiling and singing Kumbaya because they were so ecstatic with my constructive feedback. What I do mean is that I’ve been very clear (and nurturing) in my communication and the person with whom I’m speaking clearly understands my position.
How about when I’m on the receiving end of the candid communication? I frequently have to beg people to be candid with me because most people – family, friends, customers, consultants- would rather say nothing than deliver candid, constructive feedback.
Why?
Most people think that we’d prefer being in the dark or unclear about a situation than to risk hurting us with their feedback. Feedback is ESSENTIAL for our growth. There is no growth without feedback.
When I receive candid (negative) feedback does it sting? Yes–for a few seconds. But, now that I’m armed with the truth – or the other person’s perception of the truth, I can determine how to best proceed with improving the relationship, situation and/or myself.
I’d like to thank Rep Joe Wilson for his candor. I would be very surprised if he and President Obama don’t end up speaking or meeting within the next week or so.
I will encourage him to use another word that I just looked up in the dictionary in future communication - tact: the ability to appreciate the delicacy of a situation and to do or say the kindest or most fitting thing.
I’ll give him a “do-over” on this one.
Thanks for the laugh, Joe!
