On Facebook last week, a friend wrote about his thankfulness for the electricity that just returned to his home after a snow and ice storm. He didn’t appreciate the electricity all that much until he was without it for 5 days.
Another friend who exercises every day is finally back exercising after being sidelined on crutches with a bad back since October. Only after this event does she now appreciate her ability to drive and to bend over and lace her sneakers. She had lost the freedom to be able to get in the car and go where she wanted, when she wanted.
I recently got a small glimpse into the freedom that I take for granted each and every day when I lost it for a day and half.
A few weeks back was my turn to serve the Commonwealth of Massachusetts by showing up for jury duty at 8:30AM about 30 miles (60 minutes) from my home. In order to get in my daily morning routine of prayer, scripture, meditation, affirmations, breakfast and exercise and still arrive on time, it meant an even earlier wake-up call than normal.
As I happily approached the front door of the courthouse, I read the sign on the door that said NO FOOD OR DRINK and wondered how I’d maintain my healthy eating habit of consuming a small meal every three hours if I were chosen for a jury. With a sense of excitement and adventure at the break of my usual work routine, I opened the door and saw three courthouse workers sitting around a metal detector. I gave them a gregarious good morning and heard nothing in response but the sound of silence (think crickets). I couldn’t imagine that three humans in an empty room would not respond to a warm greeting on a dark and rainy morning so, I gave them a second and significantly louder good morning. This time I received a grunt from one of them. At that point, I knew that I was not in Kansas anymore.
I don’t think that they’re used to seeing any happy humans enter that building. Most of the jurors are not happy to be there, the lawyers seem stressed, unhappy and rushed, those on trial are nervous and distracted and the courthouse workers seem to be just going through the paces. I can almost hear the self-talk going on in the minds of the courthouse workers (think eeyore), Nothing ever changes much here- miserable people, same hours, same building, same rules, same laws, same uniform. The entire culture within the system is comprised of lots of do’s and don’ts, gloom and doom.
After a few minutes of waiting in the lobby next to the metal detector, I was told to go down the hall and wait in the second waiting area for jury members. I was given a number (4) – like a convict – and told to be seated and wait for further instructions.
Where was the Marriott concierge lounge attendant greeting me with, Good morning, Mr. Gregoire, and offering to get me a coffee and my choice of USA Today or the Wall Street Journal?
If I really was at the Marriott, it must’ve been their newest, really low-end brand – The Jailhouse Marriott – The hotel designed by prisoners, for prisoners. This place that I found myself lock-ed in by law had no manners, no coffee, no food, no drink and lots of rules! What’s with all the rules? Why can’t I drink in the juror’s waiting area? I was even willing to use a sippy-cup if they’d give me one. I was thirsty!
I found out from the unbelievably polite and considerate judge (a glimpse of light and hope within the darkness) why there wasn’t any coffee for the jurors. They had purchased a coffee machine and had neglected to send it out to bid so, they were forced to remove the coffee machine from the courthouse. I’ve since notified Carolyn (my wife) that henceforth, each item that is purchased within the Gregoire household must be sent out to bid. We need more rules, paperwork and bureaucracy within our home too!
Because I was lost in Bob Kull’s fantastic book – Solitude – preparing for my interview on Friday, I was pretty happy to sit at the table with the other prisoners (I mean jurors) and finish reading the book. The next thing I knew, my silence was broken as the court officer (names omitted to protect the guilty) said, “you can’t be chewing that gum in here”! After the initial shock of his question, I looked over my right shoulder toward him and said with a big smile on my face, you’re kidding, right? He said, “No, I’m not kidding. We have rules here!” I guess the Diet Coke that the woman next to me was consuming was allowed because of an amendment to one of their laws.
In order to put things into perspective, I’ve worked for myself since March of 1999 – I have a great boss who imposes very few rules upon himself or others! I work when I choose to work and I stop working when I choose. I am blessed to have enough food at home that I eat and drink whatever I choose, whenever I choose. When I travel – which is quite often – I’m fortunate to stay at Marriott properties most of the time and am treated with dignity and respect by their well-trained staff. This is the reality in which I live my ideal life.
Life and freedom are about choice. We get to choose every word, every thought, every gesture and every action. It’s all an act of creation. This freedom allows us to create the ideal lives and the ideal world. Constructive cultures are found within families, companies and countries whereby people have the ability to choose (think for themselves). That type of culture assumes that people are smart, accountable and know what’s right and what’s wrong. It assumes that people do NOT need to be told what and how to do things. This type of environment results in creativity and productivity because people are NOT being told what to do.
On 2/24/10 at approximately 8:10AM, I gained an even stronger appreciation for each and every freedom that I enjoy on a daily basis because for that entire day and the next morning, I was not free. It was not just because of the way that I noticed the court officers treating me and the other jurors, it was the entire judicial system that made me Thank God for my freedom and pray that my wife, children and I would never be on trial in a court of law.
I was chosen for a trial whereby a man was charged by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts with assault and battery and obstruction of justice. In this case, the lawyers that are paid to represent the best interests of their clients proceed to ask detailed questions of the witnesses, defendant and plaintiff of an event that took place exactly 12 months ago. I am not kidding you when I tell you that I don’t remember the subject of a blog that I wrote 2 days ago. If you remind me of the topic, I will remember it but, the detail of what I wrote on any given day is unimportant (to me).
Because of my vocation and the education that I’ve received from some of the best minds in the world in the fields of psychology and spirituality, I understand the importance of living in the present and thinking about an even more ideal future. I spend very little time in the past. The judicial system is all about the exact detail(s) of what happened in the past.
One of the secrets of life is to live in the present and enjoy being where you are at each and every instant. You have the freedom to live this gift today. Are you?
I recently asked you to appreciate this thing called life. Today, we remind ourselves to cherish the wonderful gift of freedom. Freedom to what?
- Freedom to think and to focus on positive thoughts about yourself and others.
- Freedom to work wherever you choose doing whatever you want to do.
- Freedom to spend every minute of every day exactly how you choose.
- Freedom to speak to others and say exactly what you’ve been wanting to say, but afraid to do so.
- Freedom to eat whatever you want, whenever you want.
- Freedom to set goals for the ideal life that you envision.
- Freedom to know that today and each and every day is an opportunity to start over. Life is full of 2nd chances.
- Freedom to chew gum anywhere (except a courthouse).
What are you free to do that you’re currently not doing? Why?
As far as I can tell, there are only two types of prisons. One type is the one we end-up in if we’ve been convicted a breaking one of societies many laws. I can’t encourage you enough to do everything possible to avoid ending up in that type of prison.
The second type of prison is the self-imposed type that we place ourselves in with our self-limiting thoughts. I can’t get another or new job. I’ll never have a good relationship with my family. I’m in a lousy marriage. I can’t be myself around people because, if I’m just myself, people won’t like me. I don’t have the time to get a degree. My schedule won’t allow me the time to exercise.
Many of us keep ourselves in self-created prisons with our thoughts. Fortunately, you can break-out of your prison today or any day you choose and no one is going to come after you. Once you recognize that you’re the judge, jury and warden of your own prison, you get to free yourself whenever you choose.
There are no guards keeping you in.
There are no dogs ready to chase you.
There is no barbed wire preventing you from leaving your imaginary walls.
Listen to your inner-wisdom. You have the power to release yourself from the self-imposed rules and laws that you’ve been allowing yourself to use to regulate – and limit- your life.
It’s time to break-out! You are free to move-on.
